Don't Be a Bad Sport, Old Sport.

Who ISN'T talking about Gatsby?

I forced The Beard by pain of death to go to Gatsby this weekend on a double with Haley and her fiance Chris. He was less than thrilled. Who doesn't want to go to stuff they hate with someone who geeks out and dresses up for every occasion? Sounds pretty fun to me.

The Beard is a BIT of a contrarian. It's more extreme individualism. He's no robot. I am grateful for that. You like something? He hates it. If something is popular, it has to be garbage. It's not necessarily being a hipster. It's more that he just refuses to like/do/be things just because its expected.

He hates President Lincoln. If that tells you anything. Which it should.

He hated the book. "It's not a story! It's all this backstory and undeveloped characters and just because Fitzgerald writes amazing prose it's become this brainless classic!"

Therefore I guess he gets bonus points for sucking it up and going with me. I owe him like 100 hours of Red Sox baseball now. 

I disagree with him, however. Even though I also dislike the story, for the most part. Terrible people doing terrible things. The only real moral of the story is that you will lose things if you live carelessly. But I still liked the book because of it's few redeeming qualities, listed hereafter. The story sticks with you. I'm still thinking about it, days after seeing the movie.

I liked the movie more than the book and here's why - the parts of the book I liked the best were better represented in the movie than in my head.

The parties. Doesn't this just make you want to wear something sparkly and dance? I couldn't have pictured this in my head. The movie did a great job.

Gatsby's plan and backstory. I love that they took the time to explain and show where he'd been.

The infatuation, however selfish and unrealistic, between Gatsby and Daisy. I literally trembled (hate that I just used that word) at one of the romantic parts. Embarrassing, right?

And of course, the fashion. Goes without saying.

How can you not love it? The soundtrack has been on repeat since Saturday. I highly recommend it.

The Beard did say one thing that is 100% true.

"If at any point, ANY of the characters make the right decision, the book would have been over."

Gatsby is honest with Daisy about his upbringing/lack of wealth --> She either still loves him and commits or he realizes she's shallow and moves on. No book.

Gatsby is a hardworking, honest businessman --> He makes half as much money, accept reality, settles down with a nice women worth 20 Daisies. No book. 

Tom is a good husband to Daisy --> She loves him, doesn't wonder about Gatsby, no one gets their nose broken, no one gets hit by a car. No book.

Wilson is a good husband to Myrtle --> She loves him, doesn't cheat, no one gets their nose broken, no one gets hit by a car, Wilson doesn't shoot Gatsby. No book.

Myrtle doesn't step out on Wilson --> No one gets their nose broken, no one gets hit by a car, no one gets shot dead out of miscommunication. No book.

Nick doesn't facilitate the rendezvous between Daisy and Gatsby --> They don't have a torrid secret affair spanning East and West Egg. No book.

Daisy stops the car, takes responsibility for the accident --> No one gets murdered. We all learn about consequences. No book.

Because that IS the book - every character making every wrong decision and getting few, if any, consequences for it. In the end it's an allegory, though. Gatsby dies symbolically - they'll all meet their due eventually with the Great Depression quick on their heels. Excess breeds a fall from grace. Carelessness breeds despair. 

.... wickedness... never was.... happiness. Omg see what I did there?

And if they'd just joined the Church, just think how much happier their lives would be???

Creep Central

No, this post isn't about another creepy BYU date. Sorry. Maybe I'll dish out a few more of those soon.

This is about the creepiest thing about me, Danica Anne.

Most of you probably know I'm a geek right? I own more Star Wars paraphernalia than your average citizen. The guy at Gold's Gym actually referred to me as "Star Wars Girl" on Monday because I'm always wearing a Star Wars shirt to the gym. I was flattered.

Many of you know that I like gore and violence - of the zombie flavor in particular. Walking Dead, World War Z, Quarantine, Pride & Prejudice & Zombies, etc.

But I have a love/obsession even worse than these. Definitely the creepiest thing about me.

Since high school I've been in love with the Thomas Harris "Hannibal" series. Yes, the one with the cannibal serial killer. The more popular movies (Silence of the Lambs, Hannibal, Manhunter/Red Dragon/Hannibal Rising) were based on his amazing books - which I've read many times.(I own them all if anyone is interested in reading them with me?.. no? .... no one?)

Obviously I wouldn't say I LOVE the cannibalism. I could definitely live without it. That's not what I'm there for. I love the mystery and suspense, the crime drama, the psychological elements. I love the characterization and how Dr. Hannibal Lecter becomes almost a protagonist.  I love the philosophical questions the books pose about what is "good" and the struggle to develop and follow a personal moral compass.

I love them. I love these books and movies. I love the story. I have an entire playlist dedicated to it. I've read a disgusting amount of fan fiction.

So I was beyond stoked to see that NBC has picked up a pilot season of the show Hannibal - about the relationship between Hannibal and famed detective Will Graham. This will fill the open space between the end of Hannibal Rising and the flashbacks in Red Dragon of Will catching Hannibal.

Here is the problem. The Beard is somehow morally opposed to violent films about cannibalism. He's adopted The Office, Star Wars, Harry Potter and even Star Trek. But he draws the line at Hannibal. I think it's pretty rude.

What I'm trying to say here is that the Beard needs a hobby that gets him out of the house for an hour or two each weeks so I can watch my creepy, morally objectionable TV show. Someone needs to start some sort of Fantasy Baseball Anonymous meetings or weekly Starcraft practice.

I'm also looking for best supporting actors in the role of Danica's Creepy Friend Who Watches Hannibal. And Maybe Reads the Books, Too.

Any takers?

Book Review/Pizza Night: Batting for the Other Team (Yikes)

Yesterday we went to our first book club meeting (missing the first one due to weather... booooo) and it was so great. I mentioned that I want to join 4 more book clubs and the Beard said, very wisely,

"Book clubs are to you what fantasy baseball is to me!"

And you know what? He's right. So anyone else that wants to start a book club with me - please let's? Email me. I'm totally down.

We read "The Art of Fielding" by Chad Harbach. It's a book about the intertwining lives of various characters at a small university in the midwest - including/surrounding the university's baseball team. I had high hopes when I began the book - it was all about this amazing shortstop Henry Skrimshander. The book is so fun for the first couple hundred pages! But, alas, it cannot last. Tragedy strikes and all of their lives fall into disarray. Heartbreak, death, loneliness, anxiety, depression, and terrible conduct ensues.

You can imagine the Beard's reaction when I tricked him into reading the book "It's about baseball!" only to have the baseball emphasis dwindle and the gay love affair emphasis swell about 200 pages in. Lolzies. Ryan is a homophobe, for all you new readers out there. Also, Ryan is obsessed with baseball and takes it INCREDIBLY SERIOUSLY. So to have his baseball paradise infiltrated with a gay love story - it was kind of the perfect storm.

At dinner we concluded that the story was good and the characters were interesting, but so many sections of the book were just wildly unrealistic and almost designated to become a screenplay. Overall, I would give the book a 7/10. I loved the baseball, the team esprit-de-corps, even the love stories before they fall apart. But the pain and guilt and trauma was too real, too long and too unsatisfying. Try it if you are interested in baseball, gay relationships, the internal personal struggle, or Moby Dick (a huge theme/inspiration in the book).

By far the best part of the book was discussing it at Pizzeria Limone - wow. We've heard great things but man, were we impressed. I got the Viola - a delicious pizza including proscuitto and blackberries. BLACKBERRIES!

We took the Trax because we take the Trax literally anytime we are able because we're obsessed with it. Can't wait until the Draper station opens up in August because it's seriously 3 minutes from our house. Yahtzee.

 

Shirt: AE, Skirt: Banana Republic, Boots: Forever Young, Bag: Coach, Coat: Old Navy

 

On the train home, while we were still in downtown SLC two kids climbed onto the train. They were probably about 13 or 14 and were very rowdy. The Beard was convinced they were high, although when I deny things like that I have to accept that I have never been good at noticing those things. They were bugging passengers, giggling furiously, swearing, and just generally being teen messes.

It was after 9 pm. On a Monday night. Downtown SLC. These boys were just riding the Trax around for fun, according to their conversation. And everyone just rolled their eyes at these little punks.

But I couldn't. It hit me in the heart. These were just like so many of my students. And they WERE freaking annoying. But what is your life like if riding around on Trax at 9 pm on Monday nights in downtown semi-sketchy SLC is better than being home? I just felt so responsible and sad for them.

You can take Danica out of her classroom, but I guess you can't take the classroom out of Danica.

Make good choices, sketchy Trax boys! Somewhere a random History teacher is thinking about you in a non-creepy way!

A Real Hippie Wouldn't Hurt Bambi

I hope you're intrigued by that title. It's hard to believe, but it is actually relevant to my Saturday night.

On Friday one of my besties from high school - Mckensie crashed with me, and Gabi came over to hang with us. We stayed up late braiding our hair and watching puppy videos on YouTube like any other 14 year olds at a sleepover. We even played M.A.S.H. (no, we didn't.)

I slept in and read in bed until 1 pm like a really responsible adult. After breakfast and several Office episodes in my sweats The Beard talked me into showering and getting ready. (He bribed me with Target and the Library.)

Now comes the Hippie part. My bangs were not particularly cooperative. Plus Gabi had shown me a more effective way to fishtail braid my hair. The only option was this turban/bandana/wrap/headband that I originally bought to wear to Seven Peaks.

If you know me at all, you know I'm pretty much as far from a hippie as you can get. No one has and no one will ever describe my style as "Boho" or "Hippie Chic" because all of my clothes are fitted, black and not out of place at a funeral.

So it was kind of fun to wear an outfit my dad would call "hipster" and caused the Beard to look questioningly at my head. Gotta mix it up, you know?

After outfit photos and picking up my 6 items on hold at the awesome Draper Library, we were off to my second favorite weakness - Target. Those dollar bins are ALWAYS my kryptonite, but especially when they feature Star Wars items. Yahtzee.

Great day right? Going really well. Star Wars. Libraries. Outfit photos. Even a Sonic run.

Soon to be nearly ruined when I hit a deer on the way home. Now, I grew up in Mapleton so I've had my fair share of close shaves with deer. But I've never hit one. For once in my life I was not speeding, so we didn't hit him very hard. He got up and pranced away, and there was minimal damage to the plastic fender flare on my Jeep.

Traumatic damage to my emotional state, however. We're talking bawling and hyperventilating. I just felt so BAD. I didn't mean to hit you, little guy! I promise! I'm really sorry if you are bruised and sore! I hope your family took care of you and you warned all of them to stay off that winding, poorly lit road.

I'm sure the Beard was equal parts embarrassed and concerned about my reaction, but he was so good at remaining calm and reassuring. I'd have probably run into the woods to apologize to Bambi if he hadn't been there. He even took his crazy wife to the movies later to cheer her up.

Lesson Learned: if you dress like a hippie/gypsy while driving a gas guzzling SUV the universe will put you right back in your place.

Coming Soon to a Theater Near You: Your Life

We were recently invited to join a book club by our chic friend Cambri Christensen Visser. I was completely and totally psyched. I love to read and I never know WHAT to read. Goodreads is great and I like to use it for inspiration. But almost more than reading the books, I love TALKING about books. When I read Gone Girl over fall break I was dying to talk to someone, anyone about it and none of my friends had read it. Pure hell.

So a book club is the best scenario of all time. Books. Friends. Discussion. Food. Yahtzee. I'm looking to get involved in a few more. Message me if you're interested. Srsly.

The book we chose for our first round was "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years" by Donald Miller. He is a memoir-humor-lifestyle-self help-religion-grab bag writer. I have his signature name-making book "Blue Like Jazz" on hold for pickup at the library and I can't wait to grab it tomorrow and begin devouring it like this one.

It is, in a word, inspirhilariawesome. Because I couldn't use just one word to describe it. Especially for a somewhat rootless, disillusioned, bored 20-something, it just hit me right in the heart. Not with fear, shock or even poignancy, but with simple truth.

The premise of the book is that Donald Miller is spinning his wheels, bored in the lull after the success of "Blue Like Jazz." Some filmmakers approach him out of the blue and want to make a movie about his life/memoir. Suddenly, Miller is faced with the amazing opportunity to deeply examine and even rewrite his own life. The lessons he learns along the way are amazing and so completely applicable to our lives.

The main theme is that we are all living "stories." He begins seeing himself as a character while trying to write his life script, and sees that its probably the way God sees us in the stories where He places us. We have a lot of control in our stories, but He is there, whispering in our ears the elements to make our story better if we will just listen to him.

Story elements apply to our lives. Quotable bits like "When we live a story we are telling the people around us what we think is important" and "if the character hasn't changed, the story isn't over yet" really made me think about my life as a story that I want to spice up. Good characters face trials and challenges, have to do some good to be likable, and always come out on top in the end. Eventually.

Another big theme was the idea that WE have to make our story readable. Tellable. Interesting. Miller realizes when the filmmakers try to make up parts of his story that his true story isn't interesting enough for the screen.

Is mine? Is yours? If a filmmaker sat down with you to make a movie of your life, would it make a good movie? Probably not. Sorry. No offense. Mine would be super boring too. I spend far too much time on the couch watching The Office and reading fashion blog/magazines to make my life interesting.

At that point, Miller does a number of things to make his life a good "story." He tries to find his estranged father. He hikes to Macchu Picchu in Peru. He bikes across the United States. It's not easy. He has an incredibly difficult, even painful time. But he knows that it's the right thing to do and he learns that pain wins you things. Like experience. Knowledge. And scenes.

The most visual, personally applicable part was his description of scenes. Great movies, great stories, have great scenes. Think of an action hero walking calmly away from an expanding explosion. A romantic kiss in the rain. A meditating character at sunset. Think of your favorite movie and you're sure to recall a "scene."

Now think of your favorite memories in life. Likely they are "scenes" as well. They don't often come reading on the couch, Danica. Miller notes that many of his favorite scenes happen in the outdoors while DOING things. Point taken. I'll get out and DO more. But maybe not till this snow melts in the spring...

What I walked away with, was that my life can be an incredible story. You just need to be willing to accept an "inciting incident." Accept pain. Accept challenge. Get out of your box, so to speak. Do good things that will make you the type of character viewer/readers want to root for. Make memorable scenes. Listen to your screenwriter, God, whispering your cue in the corner of your ear. Live like a documentary crew is following you around, day in and day out.

Live your life like it's a story that you'd want to pay $8.50 and a bucket of popcorn for.

Start by reading this book.

Then email me so we can talk more about it.

Positively Amazing

A few weeks ago I picked up Corrie Ten Boom's "The Hiding Place" - an account of her adventures and horrors during the German occupation of Denmark and subsequent travels to Ravensbruck. I've always enjoyed learning about World War II and I wanted to freshen up before my class got to it this week. I thought I'd do a bit of a book review for anyone whose New Years Resolution is to read.

My review: Read it.

You won't regret it. Promise. As I was reading, I was struck several times at how familiar the stories sounded, and then realized that the stories I already knew and had heard in sacrament/Conference talks were HER stories.

For instance, one story in particular illustrates the power of positive thinking, gratitude and prayer. Corrie's sister Betsie is a saint. Just a pure-hearted, loving, charitable saint. She is the one who bears Corrie up when all light seems to dim from the world around them. They are moved into these awful, awful barracks where there are three women to a rough, thin cot and the entire place is teeming with fleas. Corrie, as a normal human being, is skeptical about the hopefulness of the condition. Betsie insists that they must pray in gratitude for EVERYTHING that they have in those barracks.

"Even the fleas?" Corrie asked incredulously.

"Even the fleas," a resolute Betsie replied. So she did. She prayed in gratitude for those fleas.

Weeks later, the German camp directors started running surprise raids on different barracks. Corrie was hiding vitamins for Betsie, a bible and their sister's sweater -- all contraband items in a Nazi work camp. They were terrified that these items would be found and confiscated, and the owners punished mercilessly. The bible in particular was their only solace in their cruel lives.

At the last minute, the guards arrive at the door of the barracks, taking a few steps inside and proclaiming "Fleas! I'm not going in here amongst the fleas!"

The fleas had saved them. The fleas were worthy of gratitude after all.

Along with providing a more realistic view of our cushy daily lives, and an appreciation for the sorrows and suffering of others, this book provides one of the most spiritually reassuring messages I've ever learned.

God is God. And he's everyone's.

It doesn't matter if you are a Jew in the prison camp. Or a Christian sympathizer in the prison camp. Or a Nazi German running the prison camp. Or an impoverished Muslim living in a war-torn refugee camp. Or a Latter-day Saint living in Happy Valley, U.S.A. God truly is no respecter of persons. This book illustrates beautifully the majesty of God's creation of man on earth. He listens to all, invites all, and blesses all.

While I am immensely grateful for the true and only Priesthood on this earth, it is comforting to know that people all over the world are living true principles and that God speaks to them as well. We're all in this together. It's only a matter of time until we're all official.

[P.S. I'm on Goodreads. Come find me.]

Got Brains?

Now that I'm done with school (I still do a victory dance every time I get to say that), I finally have time to read. I was finally able to start this zombie book I've been wanting to read for a while, which has rekindled my zombie love once again.

Zombie literature/cinema/pop culture is becoming much more trendy. Which for once I think is great. So many people think zombie stuff is just about gore and terror. Great characteristics, but not vitally important to good zombie material. Scary movies are what led me to zombie stuff, but it's the realism that really addicted me. What if there was a zombie apocalypse? Would you live in a mall? Which person in your family would be the one to completely lose their heads and run screaming into a horde of ghouls? Would humanity be preserved? Is emotion humanity's greatest strength, or will it prove its downfall? This is deep stuff, you guys.

So now. Without further ado, my top zombie picks:

1. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. What started it all. I got this book and read it rapidly over Christmas break last year. It combined two of my favorite things - the wit, intrigue and romance of an Austen novel with the intensity, fear and violence of apocalyptic fiction. Fantastic. People have asked "Well doesn't it take away from P&P?" My answer is no. It absolutely does not. He sticks to the story and shows supreme respect for Austen's work. This is hands down my favorite book. I love it. With all my heart.

2. Zombieland. This movie is hilarious and entertaining. Great acting. Great effects. Overuse of the f-word (sorry). Just all around awesome.


3. The Zombie Survival Guide. The Beard gave me this for Christmas and I haven't had a chance to read it until now. It's incredible. Max Brooks is awesome. He details categories of zombie breakouts, weapon use, stealth methods, anything you can think of. It's completely serious. I love it.

4. Humans vs. Zombies. Utah State University participated in this Zombie Week game where people were tagged as zombies and their goal was to infect as many people as possible, and students could defend themselves with Nerf guns. That alone was almost enough to make me want to change my major and transfer. No way would BYU ever OK something like this. Still. I am now adding to my list of goals that I would like to participate in this game at some point in my life. Learn more about it at Humansvszombies.org.

5. World War Z. Another Max Brooks classic. If you are into historical fiction, military fiction, action, or apocalyptic stuff, this book is for you. It's a collection of stories from all kinds of people documenting the different stages and location of the Zombie War. Incredible. The detail and seriousness that Max Brooks achieves is stunning. I couldn't put it down. Thanks to my zombie buddy and co-worker Chris for lending it to me! I'll give it back someday...

These are my top 5, but I have quite a few more recommendations, if you are looking for more. Try it. Try some Zombies. It might surprise you how much you like it. It's not just about eating brains, after all...

Pretty (Ugly) People

Last week I watched the 1996 version of Jane Eyre, starring Charlotte Gainsbourg as Jane and William Hurt as Rochester. This is one of my favorite books (read it. I'll lend it to you) and I'm getting excited for the new version to hit only select theaters this weekend. Honestly, I probably won't see it until I can Redbox it, but I'm still excited. I thought this was a great representation, but I found myself mildly dissatisfied.


No one wants to watch two ugly people kiss and fall in love.

Sorry. But I'm right. Why do we go see movies? Because they transport us to another time, another place, another life. Why would we trade for something average? Pointless.

I would never knock the genius of the Bronte sisters. I love the book. I fully recognize that major parts of the theme and storyline are the physical appearances of Jane and Edward, Jane's humble upbringing, the status difference between them, and so on. I know. I get it. In the book it doesn't bother me. I tend to focus so much more on the dialogue, creating less of a mental picture. But when I'm watching the movie I can't help but think....



Ugh.

Is it too much to ask that actors be cast (even if inappropriately) that are attractive? Its so much easier for me to watch. Every romantic garden scene, every lingering glance would be safe from my interrupting thought of "Well this might be more gush-worthy if it wasn't two uncomfortably average-looking people." Does this make me a shallow, entertainment-seeking American? Probably. It would be worth it.

Wales: Day 7 The Book(s) of Three (Castles)

On this morning I marked my one week anniversary of living in the UK! Haha. It was nice to be able to notice how I had adapted to the time change, as the last remains of jet lag were succumbing to general physical fatigue due to our pace. The weather was lovely (we've been incredibly lucky), so it was a good day to be out and about.

The morning was spent in touring three Norman castlses, lumped together locally and historically. They were built by the Normans to keep an eye on the Welsh. The Welsh were remarkably good at remaining autonomous and sovereign despite the number of invasions of Britain. They resisted the Romans (Boudicca), Normans, and later (and somewhat still are resisting) the British. Nothing was particularly stunning about these castles, but it was a light, pretty morning.

White Castle was first. It was the biggest and included a moat, so it was clearly my favorite. Maybe I'm naive or immature, but if a castle has a moat, it's automatically totally legit in my mind. And I'll remember it more clearly. Such is certainly the case with Raglan Castle (still my favorite).


Also, I quite like taking pictures on top of castles, because not only can you see the tops of these magnificent buildings, but the surrounding countryside is nearly as captivating. We take LOTS and LOTS of photos. How else will we remember this in 20 years?

Next we took a short drive to Skenfirth Castle. Very similar to White Castle, but smaller and less well-preserved. We were privileged to hear a presentation on Welsh author and poet Leslie Norris. I was able to read his short story "A Roman Spring" before we left, and it's really cool now to connect the imagery in his story to the scenery around me. Literature is amazing. Also, we got a good workout in by scaling the inside walls of the keep. :)


The last but 2nd place of the three castles was Grosmont. The small town of Grosmont was having their festival that day, so we didn't stay long. It did have a cool tower that set it apart from the other two Norman castles in its pod, however.

The best part of the day was our trip to Hay-on-Wye. Hay-on-Wye is a tiny, winding town set on a hill. This town boasts of 15+ small used book shops. Sometimes 3 or 4 right in a row. It was fantastic. I was feeling particularly pensive and solitary this day, so I plugged in my headphones and walked the city by myself. Bookstore after bookstore, I walked my fingers along the edges of shelves, caressing the spines of books, lifting heavy tomes and rifling through boxes of yellowing paperbacks.

The town is very quaint and small, so I enjoyed walking through indoor and outdoor bookstores and glass-filled antique shops like I was in a movie. I was quite hungry, so I found a small farmer's market on one street and purchased a fresh apple and a Diet Coke, then turned back to searching for books. I wasn't looking for anything in particular. I saw some cool things that I thought would make good souvenirs, but books might add too much weight to my luggage to bring home.

But then the stars aligned. Really. I was walking slowly along a shelf that didn't seem to get much traffic. It was at my eye level (so probably lower than the eye level of most customers), and, like every shelf, crammed with books. I saw a small paperback twisted behind two larger hardbacks. I carefully slid it out and what did I find? An old, but usable copy of Jane Eyre!!! For only one pound! It was fantastic. Isn't that like a scene from a movie? Solitary young female, quietly perusing bookshelves in a pretty, sleepy British town on a hill, stumbles across a used copy of Jane Eyre and spends her afternoon immersed in it.

I bought a chocolate bar from another little shop (chocolate is pretty cheap here, and higher quality than it is at home - Tiffany.... I know. I'm bringing you some) and found a quiet spot on a bench overlooking the valley and countryside. I ate chocolate and read Jane Eyre and gazed at the beautiful green countryside for a couple hours until the group reunited and we drove home.

Magical.