Tuesday 16 April 2013

How to Interpret the Finals Week Posts In Your Feed

It's that time of year. The lovely, refreshing, rebirth of all the idiots who try to out-finals one another.

For your convenience, I put together a basic list of interpretations:

"I have 27 papers, 14 projects and 9 finals this week! Omg!" = I'm an idiot that can't read a course catalog.

"I slept 5 hours in the last 2 days! Soooooo TiReD!" = I'm an idiot that can't manage my time.

*Picture of $300 worth of junk food* "Must be finals week LOL" = I'm an idiot that needs constant sugar breaks to help my short attention span while "studying." BONUS - also an idiot that will act pissed about getting sick during/after finals while treating my body like crap before/during finals.

"Looks like I'll be cramming all night!" = I'm an idiot that was lazy all semester and did nothing to study or prepare for class.

"Here comes finals! I'm SCREWED! Wish me luck!" = I'm an idiot that is scared and desperately needs others to diminish their feelings of guilt and worthlessness.

"You know you're screwed when you don't even recognize some words on the review! #help" = I'm an idiot that never went to class because I slept through it even though it was at 11 am.

"My professor is INSANE! How can you assign this much for FINALS WEEK?!" = I'm an idiot who doesn't understand the rigor of a college education and has to blame mistakes on others.

"Just failed that final, and guess what? I don't even care! YOLO!" = I'm an idiot that is intensely concerned about that test score and feels like the idiot that I am.

"I handed in my papers late and 50% done, but whatever because I'M GRADUATEDDDDDD!!!!" = I'm an idiot that you will now have to deal with in the professional workforce. Congratulations.

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